First, here's wonderful piece by Dave Barry, who's better known for his humorous syndicated newspaper column. This piece is serious and, like everything Barry writes, is well-crafted and memorable. The only problem is that it's a PDF file, so you may have to adjust the zoom to read it.
http://www.davebarry.com/natterings_files/daveMILLIONWORDS.pdf
Here's an essay that helped a high school student from Wisconsin get into Connecticut College. Notice how the writer captures your attention immediately with his opening. Concrete nouns and strong verbs help make his case throughout the essay.
http://www.conncoll.edu/admissions/essays/2010/bjorklund.html
Finally, here's one by a well-renowned editor, who discusses the importance of finding the right "place" to write. Take special notice of his tone.
In posting your responses, write your first name only - no last names please. You should probably write in Word or another word processing program so you can proofread and edit your work before posting it.
6 comments:
I read the essay written by the college student. After finishing it I could not believe this was actually written by a student. In my opinion the author got right to the point while holding the readers attention. The opening line is descrptive enough to read more, and also gives some insight on what to expect from the rest of the essay. I like how the author begins his piece with a personal anecdote, and later on explains the meaning behind it, and also how it shaped him as a person for the future. This essay should be used as an exemplary piece of work to help other students when filing oput college aplications.
After reading the essay written by the college student,I was shocked becasue it was written so well.I thought that it was very informative and made me want to read more. I liked the fact that the writer gave a personal experience and tied everything together.
After reading a well crafted thoughtout essay written, by a college student, i realized how descriptive this student was. The student gives you real life expierence that you can relate to. This essay gives you a good example of what a good college essay should be and helps you understand what you should do.
I felt that this essay was very carefully though-out and that the writer showed a clear understanding of using the english language as a tool. Dane gave clear descriptions of the characters that he described as "family" and allowed me to feel as though I knew them. It was a very personal feeling essay that I enjoyed more so than previous ones I have read.
I thought that the short story, “Just A Moment… A Million Words,” by David Barry, is very well written and captures the reader’s interest right away. This story is significant because it shows how the dieing father worked very hard his entire life, and the son had a good relationship with him when he was healthy, so if all he wanted was a bowl of oatmeal, when the son was suppose to have his last words with him, then it was ok because he had a million words with him throughout his lifetime. This story is also very well organized and has a good structure.
The college essay was very well written and they thought a lot before they were going to write it.This essay was short but had a lot of information in it. the author told me what was going to happen and that made me want to read more of it. The writer also tied everything together at the end. JIllian
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